I must have been high — I was having a rough night. My vibrator broke because I tried to use it in the tub, I lost my favorite ring, and my dog stepped on a bee. My ex was notorious for cheating, so I would randomly sniff his sleeping balls or scan his phone at any…

I’m not just a hole to fill! — For crying out loud. I swear on everything; most men just rely on the size and power of their penis to please their partner. For the sake of women everywhere, our vaginas have feelings too! When you’re thrusting inside of a woman, there is more to focus on besides what…

The strange sympathy of a victim — It’s weird. I feel sympathy for one of the men who took my tiny life and drug it through the dirt, making a heart shape to justify his perversions. backstory I was ten years old, and my father had just passed away. He died of cancer. And while he was a…

I was the glorious Miss Piggy for a night — By the way, this is a true story. It may seem like I’m a crazy person, and I can assure you, I am. Anyway! I was home alone for the better half of the day, and like usual, I wanted to masturbate as much as humanly possible. I scanned my…

My vaginal guru will lead the way — It’s true. I’m already setting up the webpage. I thought about it and then decided, why the hell not? There’s damn near nothing I haven’t tried, and I can make any man or woman climax back to back until they finally give up like that Bic lighter you keep flicking…

Never waste any part of your meal — I’m going to have a serious discussion here. There seems to be a giant misconception about the female genitalia. I want to assume most of you know that there is much more between my legs than a hole and a clitoris, right? I don’t think I’ve ever encountered a sexual…

Something to ponder about — Before I dig in, I want to say that this is my personal opinion based on the advancements of this software that I’ve researched. While I will provide text from the Neurolink website, I have zero clue about the outcome of this procedure and its promised abilities. …

If she’s not dick thirsty, you fail as a man — Yes, I meant that. If you don’t crave your partner frequently, you either suck in bed, or your partner does. When two people know how to tease and please their partners, sexual desire is like a damn rocket ship traveling to the bed 24/7. For the ladies out there who…

I am starting an online class soon to prove my points further. — Do you think I’m kidding? I can make the most stubborn penis cry beneath my mighty lips. I shall taketh thy meat stick in my grasp and show it the reason of its existence! In all seriousness, giving grade A blow jobs is 100% an art form. First, you must…